Wednesday, March 4, 2015
I don't think that I'm incapable of observation it is just that my mind is always in the near future or distant future depending on the day. My mind is typically a few steps ahead of where I am. I try to practice mindfulness but have yet to develop that good habit. I'm reminded to be mindful as I feel the moments slip away as my babies grow up. Where did seven years go? Where did the last year go and how about today?
Writing is forcing me to hone my senses and take the time to notice.
Tonight we headed out on our evening walk with the dogs, Bart and Lisa. We usually get up from dinner, leave the dishes and head out. It is good for all of us to get a little fresh air before bed and for the dogs to get out of the yard after being cooped up all day. This time of year it is dark so in addition to the coats, hats, gloves and other winter gear, we don blinking lights and head lamps to scream "HELLO" to any cars that might pass our way. Just as we pushed the jog stroller out of the garage it started to snow, hard.
As we walked blinking snowflakes out of our eyelashes, I found myself being much more keen to my surroundings. I noticed the moon peeking through one thin opening in the clouds. I heard Emma's shrieks from inside the stroller and her hands patting on the plastic sides of her weatherproof enclosure. At one point, I called Bart and Lisa back to us and Bart jumped up in the air and tried to attack Lisa. I thought what a spry move for the old guy. Time and time again on the walk I noticed what I haven't paid attention to before. The jingle of a dogs collar, the snow in the light of the headlamp and the slap of my daughter's shoes on the pavement as she plays puppy dog having me throw her an endless supply of imaginary doggy treats.
Allowing my mind to obsess over what could be kills the moments that are. Maybe just maybe writing about the slices of my life will help me savor them too.